No more second guessing. I’m telling you now, give it up for good! It will be the best thing you could ever do for yourself and your family.
Dorothy Breininger, in researching her book, Time Efficiency Makeover, found that people spend anywhere from 15 minutes to 2 hours a day rehashing their choices. Her example is “do I really want to go to the party on Saturday?” Imagine, 15 minutes to 2 hours a day, every day, of rehashing and second guessing. How much time do you spend?
(I learned of this book and statistic in an online course in Time Management that I’m taking over at Simplify 101; I encourage you to check out Aby’s website and courses for yourself.)
For us parents and homeschoolers, I would add questions like:
Is there a better curriculum for history that I don’t know about yet?
Is this homeschooling thing really working? or Would my children be better off in school?
Should I start main lesson with songs and verses even though my children don’t enjoy them?
Would my child be better off in grade one than grade two?
I could go on and on! I’m sure you have questions of your own that you could add as well. Questions themselves are good things, but dwelling on them or even worse, coming back and questioning ourselves and our decisions after we’ve made them can be detrimental.
My personal advice based on over twenty years of parenting and homeschooling?
- Ask the questions.
- Discuss with whomever you think would be helpful.
- Let them rest until you feel clear on the answer.
- Take action.
- Give things time.
- Revisit the question if necessary but don’t give up too soon.
And vow to GIVE UP CONSTANTLY SECOND GUESSING YOURSELF AND YOUR DECISIONS. The trick that I’ve found that helps the most is to explore with a sense of curiosity rather than judgement.
All of life is about wondering, choosing something to try, and adjusting as we go. Everyone from baseball players to CEOs to teachers to farmers to doctors do this. So why can’t you?
I leave you with this quote: “Worry is the darkroom in which negatives can develop.”
And if you find you need some personal support to give up constantly second guessing yourself, consider scheduling a Mentor Session with me. I’d love to help.
Simplicity Sundays is a series of posts offering ideas for peeling back the layers in our lives to what is most important: connection with our children and each other. Many of these ideas are inspired by the book Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne as well as my work with parents as a homeschooling Mentor.